vaspider:

vaspider:

chantylay:

A note about kink at pride

So it’s pride month so it’s time for all the baby queers to complain about people wearing leather straps and or gimp masks at pride events because BDSM is not LGBTQ+. And they are right. They are also wrong.

There is a misconception that BDSM is the “logical conclusion of patriarchical power structures”. That’s just not what it is. A quick Google search of the acronym will tell you that BDSM grew out of the leather culture movement, and leather culture was started by…… gay men. All of BDSM’s fashion statements and consent rules and safewords came from gay culture if it really was patriarchy in action, there wouldn’t be so much care put into ensuring that everyone is safe or such a rigorous emphasis on the idea that the sub can call everything off at any time. That comes from viewing your partner as an equal even as you play at a power dynamic. BDSM may have been co-opted by the straights, but it comes from gay culture.

When people wear their fetish gear at pride, they aren’t saying kinky is a sexual orientation and part of LGBTQ+. They are paying homage to the queer history of the lifestyle, and many of them may be queer themselves.

Sincerely, a bi/ace-spec submissive who did the fucking research

Reminder that Brenda Howard was a proud and vocal member of the BDSM community until her death in 2005. Watch a video by her life partner about her. The kink and LGBTQ+/queer communities have long been deeply intertwined. In fact, the William Way Center in Philly hosts a monthly BDSM night! (Link with NSFW picture.)

“Bi, Poly, Switch—I’m not greedy. I just know what I want.” – Brenda Howard, Mother of Pride

The next person to put some version of “but think of the children” in the notes will be assigned to write “I must not talk like a 1980s homophobe” 100 times.