Tag: D/s
Not the same anon that asked about beating a guy up, but that that was a great answer. But what do you actually do to show people that you’re dominant then? How does anyone know? How do you prove it?
Anon:
If you feel compelled to prove to people that you’re dominant, chances are you’re not dominant.
The little dogs are the ones who always bark the most, right?
I don’t go out of my way to show anyone that I’m dominant. Literally ever. @belovedsangi and @danipup don’t kneel because they are afraid of me or intimidated by me. They don’t kneel because I have made them feel like they had to kneel.
They kneel because they trust me. They kneel because they believe that I have the personal strength to lead, to keep them accountable, to help them grow and thrive and be the best versions of themselves. And they believe that because I’ve given them every reason to believe that. Simple as that, really.
And as far as people who aren’t Dani or Sangi go, I don’t really concern myself with proving anything to them. I don’t care if they see me as “dominant” or not. I’m not a big, loud, “notice me” guy, but I do have absolute, firm belief in myself. And I think it’s precisely that, the quiet confidence, that registers with people about me.
The more you worry about “proving” your dominance, anon, the more you’ll come across to people as a chihuahua yapping at ankles. Don’t be a chihuahua.
-LMS
“I Need A Dom”
So this happened in my Inbox the other day …
“I need a Dom. Are you available?”
Me: “You sound like someone working through the Yellow Pages looking for a plumber.”
Here’s the deal, ladies. That kind of behavior is the sub equivalent of “Here’s a picture of my dick, kneel and call me Daddy!” This is not good. It says several things:
I need “a Dom,” not an individual, not a person, just someone to serve a “function.”
I am a fucked up mess, and I need you to fix me.
I have zero social skills.
I have zero self-respect.
Is this really the first impression you want to make on someone?
I spend a lot of time dope-slapping wannabe “Doms” for their clueless antics. But once in awhile, the wannabe “subs” out there need a whack upside the head as well. This would be one of those times.
preach.
For a lot of Dominants, they are not looking for ‘the perfect submissive’. They aren’t looking for someone to obey every sexual whim and then be put in a closet somewhere between uses. What does the submissive bring to the relationship?
“Oh, well, i’m good at obeying…”
Anything else? Do you have creative skills? Can you cook? Do you have a hobby? Friends? What kind of music do you like? Do you play RPGs or video games? If so, what kind?
“uh… well… i can serve you…”
Ok, fine, you want to go there? How would you serve me?
“i can do sex and stuff, and i’ll always obey you-”
Yeah, we covered that. What do you have experience with? What are your likes and dislikes? What are your limits? What will you not do?
“i’ll do anything you tell me to do…”
So you’re a Stephenie Meyer character. Utterly boring, one-dimensional, pointless, and not worth the time. You aren’t a submissive, you’re acting out the Def Comedy Jam platonic ideal of a submissive. Go do some actual research into what D/s actually is, and then message again when you’re actually over the age of consent.
And maybe i’m being a little harsh, i’m sure there are some Dom/mes out there looking for subs like this. But for a lot of us, D/s is a ‘relationship’. They are looking for a partner, not a cardboard cutout. So when you get asked questions like this, it’s to determine compatibility. And if you can’t answer them, then you aren’t compatible.
i and my Master are more than just our D/s relationship. i paint miniatures, i write, i run this blog, i play video games, tabletop games, pen-and-paper RPGs, i cook, and i read a fair amount of fanfic. i can also swear in four languages. Master plays video games, likes Warhammer… you get the point. We are more than Dom and sub, Master and pet, we are people.
Be a person.
Reblogging for this outstanding reblog comment! All it lacks is a solid ~mic drop at the end.
*sub drop* ooooops. *aftercare*
thi is like the plot to the first marketplace book
Sunday Six
John moans louder when I pull his hair. His eyes visibly dilate when I use my height to advantage or pin him down. What I maddeningly cannot see is whether he knows it himself. And more than that, would he want it to go further?
I can picture him splayed out before me, a willing subject for whatever experiments I dream up.
Dom/Sub
‘I don’t sleep in the same bed with my submissive.
I don’t go on dates, that’s not what I do.
I don’t make love, I fuck, hard.
So what do I get out of it?
Me’.All these bullshit lines are from Fifty shades and some people actually believe that to be a Dom means you have to be demanding and distant all the time. That if you show kindness then that’s being weak or submissive.
Get the fuck outta here with that and stop trying to act like a dysfunctional character from a popular book.
The acts of kindness you do for your sub may or may not look like things I do, but unless you’re planning on being in a very short-term, unrealistic relationship, you’re probably going to do nice things for each other.
That has nothing to do with roles or a power exchange. Being a Dom means being able to be Dominant. That’s it. Doesn’t mean you’re heartless or unable to show affection or care for your lady, it simply means that you enjoy taking control and being in charge.
If you want to be a mean and strict dominant all the time and you find someone who wants to serve that kind of Dom all the time, then that’s awesome. But don’t be delusional and think that’s what everyone wants.
Because they don’t. I like being a good Sir who cares for his princess at times and a bad Sir who makes his princess suffer for him and serve his every word at other times. Sometimes I like being greedy and doing it all.
The most important part is to find out what works for you and your partner and not try to convince others, your way is the only way.
They sat on the couch, fully clothed, John pressing his palm into his crotch, grinding gently.
Sherlock hardened under his hand.
John pretended he was interested in the telly, not even glancing in Sherlock’s direction.
Sherlock whimpered, spreading his legs wider. He leaned back and writhed against John’s hand, gasping and shuddering with each small motion.
“John?” Unable to articulate the question, but his meaning obvious.
“Not yet.” John said in that special tone only for him, and spared a quick glance, smiling at Sherlock, laid out beside him, nearly undone.
Sherlock’s only answer was a strangled, half moan as John rubbed the heel of his hand relentlessly up and down Sherlock’s cock.
“John!”
“You’re a good boy. You can hold on.” John said, circling his thumb over the glans as he continued to stroke. “Just transport. None of it matters. All that control you have, use it. For me.”
“Yes, sir.” Sherlock managed through gritted teeth, his eyes squeezing shut. It was agonising. It was glorious.
The minutes dragged on as Sherlock tensed and strained, then kept it together, breathing hard.
“All right. Now you may. That’s my good boy.”
Sherlock shook with the force of it, coming in his pants. Sticky. Positively filthy, like a hormone addled teenager.
John’s smiled broadened approvingly. “There my boy, now isn’t that better.”
Beltainefaerie's Flights of Fancy 