fierceawakening:

faeline:

fierceawakening:

I don’t know all the reasons why I like dark things, and I don’t think I need to know them all, but
 I was just looking at the blog of that person who said I “dehumanize and fetishize” gay men, and I saw that he was quite young (15) and his blog was all full of pastel colors and references to his mental illness and something dawned on me that I hadn’t thought about in a Tumblr context at all.

Part of my PTSD is about experiences I had in hospitals, and because of that one of my triggers is
 not pastels, all by themselves, but like
 have you ever stayed in a hospital as a kid? And everything is covered in soothing soft colors and all the nurses wear scrubs with like
 cute animal drawings on them and everyone talks in a sing-song voice and reassures you things won’t hurt when they OBVIOUSLY will and you’d rather they tell the truth, accept that you have good reasons to be scared, and get it the hell overwith?

Yeah, I think I just figured out why those kids’ blogs give me a weird tingly feeling of creeping dread.

And I think I figured out, also, where my intense leeriness of “safe spaces” and trigger warnings comes from too–even though as a person with PTSD I’m supposed to want them.

It’s because in my experience, people who were trying to make me feel safe were LYING. They were lying because it was in their interest–in mine, too, but in theirs–for me to feel calm and soothed. For me not to feel despair, or anger, or blind screaming rage.


Is it any wonder I like the stories where the people with the knives and the cruel smiles and the mind games are blatant about it? Or that I might want a few knives of my own, even though I have no desire to hurt anyone who isn’t going to get off on it?

I don’t want those kids to not need safety.

I want them to stop pretending safety looks the same for everyone.

Yes, this.

When people tell me “You’re safe,” I don’t think of Helpful Adult saving me from the monsters under the bed. I think of my teachers, saying the people who hurt me would never do such a thing, and I should stop lying because I was perfectly safe. I think of the people who used to hug me until my lungs wouldn’t fill and my ribs creaked, and got away without a whisper of a reprimand. Because they were pretty and soft, and I was cold and harsh.

That’s not safe, to me. That’s the most dangerous place in the world, because the people who live there will do anything- anything at all- if it means they don’t have to acknowledge how nasty their walled garden has really gotten. Because if I defend myself, they can’t pretend anymore. And they sure as hell won’t defend me.

THIS.

shinka:

season 1:

john has a blog, doesnt know what to write in it, finds his life boring until he meets sherlock. starts writing blog posts about his life with sherlock and the first case they have, a study in pink, john already redacts names from people working on the case, showing us already the difference between what we see in the show and what is presented as an official version of the case

moriarty who already knew about sherlock thanks to his website, gets more infos on sherlock thanks to john’s blog: sherlock already criticizes john’s blog for the way he writes about him (the great game), moriarty uses clues from john’s blog to get sherlock in the game

season 2:

sherlock gets more and more famous thanks to john’s blog: john’s blog become a real part of their jobs and twice in this season someone compliments john on his writing of a particular case: the aluminum crutch, a case about a man killing himself by accident while acting on stage, we also can see already how john distorts reality just by writing about The Woman. we also see more cases that aren’t truly talked about on the show or just referenced, full of subtext and codes. we also get multiple references to what is the truth, who is sherlock who is moriarty, the lie behind reichenbach fall and the destruction of sherlock’s reputation: a big lie wrapped up in truth

season 3:

season 3 starts with the presentation of multiple versions of the same story: the empty hearse gives us three theories about how sherlock survived, what sherlock accepts to tell us about it, we also have mary reading an excerpt of john’s blog that we never have heard before. john’s blog becomes active again, full of longing and again distortions of truth (the stag night???), tsot is about john’s blog and the story of sherlock and john seen through john’s blog and sherlock’s own memories: again we can see the difference between what is written from john’s pov and what sherlock tells us.

the main villain of this season is magnussen, controlling the media, publishing whatever he wants to pursue his own goals. we see how it doesnt matter to him if what he’s published is untrue, just the action of publishing it makes it true for the public.

tab:

john’s blog or should we say watson’s stories are part of the official narrative: sherlock in his drug mind palace is aware that what john’s writing is just an official version of the story, a public persona for sherlock that is not the truth, this episode finally makes a point of telling everyone that john’s blog is not telling the truth: it’s just something sold to the readers/audience

season 4:

finally john’s blog is the show. when before we had the line between reality and fiction, when before we could as the audience tell exactly where was the lie between what john wanted to present as the truth and what he experienced, now we have no idea: the blog has officially announced it wouldn’t be updated anymore (by the BBC) and gave a link to the actual show: the blog tells us that for more content of its nature, we had to watch the show. the promotion for season 4 was all about lie and distortion of the truth, from glitches during the relentless promo videos (an entire month before it premiered): all the videos we got from all the main characters were, in my opinion, a presentation of john’s version of these characters, hence the video glitches for each of them.

the-shadowsmiths:

httpquotescum:

beka-tiddalik:

rosebadwolf1000:

noodle-boyy:

saveachocobo-rideaprompto:

pluto-suxk:

bpd-darling:

smallblueangel:

brosefvondudehomie:

egalitarian-nature-blog:

bpd-darling:

me (cleaning up): holds knife

intrusive thoughts: what if-

me: ok edgelord we get it what if i slit my wrists right now can we please just focus

Additionally;
me: *waiting for the subway*
intrusive thoughts: what if you jumped
me: it would cause a four hour delay while they pick your body parts out of the rails you fucking prick, can we please for once get on public transit without going through this

Also;
Me: *walking along a busy road*
intrusive thoughts: What if you just fell over in front of this truck?
Me: It would back up traffic all fucking night and probably hurt a lot of people you prick.

Gosh. I never have thoughts like this

didnt ask but that sounds nice

Me: *walking down the stairs*
Intrusive Thought: I could throw myself down these flight of stairs and leave more time for everyone else!
Me: Or you end up with a broken wrist and sprain ankle you dickhead keep walking

Me: *driving on a bridge*
Intrusive thoughts: I could just drive straight into that lake and finish it right now.
Me: You asshole, this is a new car. Just fucking keep going like everyone else you prick.

oh my god,^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I needed this

Me: *standing at a lookout* It’s so beautiful here


Intrusive thoughts: yeah, look at that view, you could just step out into it and you’d probably never feel the impact when you hit the ground 20m below


Me: Bitch, don’t ruin the view for everyone else. Fucksake.

Me: *doing literally nothing*

Intrusive thoughts: What if-

Me: Can’t you just shut the fuck up and chill for once? God damn

Me: *doing dishes after cooking*

Intrusive thoughts: That meat thermometer is lookin’ mighty sharp, what if you just slammed your-

Me: It would emotionally destroy the people I care about and I’m not about to let that happen, I’m not a fuckin’ pork roast and I ain’t done yet, jESUS just let me do the dishes in peace.

California to feds: Pay $18M fire debt or we’ll watch it burn

justsomeantifas:

kestrel-is-kit-hawthorne:

justsomeantifas:

In other news the federal government is screwing over volunteers who save lives and prevent greater destruction from forest fires 
 you know right in forest fire season where it’s fucking critical,

They’re trying to play it like this is how it’s always been, that the federal government just doesn’t give the state money to pay firefighters, and that the state should foot the bill 
 and like having lived in southern oregon, (which yes i know isn’t california but we have a similar forest fire situation), 
 uh the forest service absolutely pay volunteer firefighters. 

the vast majority of our firefighters out there are volunteers, because the work is so seasonal, we need far more firefighters in the dry seasons than we do in the winter, so of course there’re a lot of firefighters who are volunteers for when the season gets bad.

they’re trying to say that they can’t legally pay volunteers when that’s literally not been the case since i’ve been alive, they’re just making up bullshit and it’s going to get a lot of people killed and a lot of land and homes destroyed. 

I hope rich people know this is going to impact them too, their businesses will burn down, if we don’t have volunteers fighting these fires everyone is going to suffer.

And the worst part about this is, they’re probably going to turn to prison labor if this gets bad enough instead of just paying the fucking firefighters. they’re not above using inmates to put their lives on the line to fight fires, so it’s just going to hurt the most vulnerable of people.

I don’t think the rest of the country really understands how bad fire season is when they don’t live in a place where there’s enough open land to really get going. Where I live (Southern Oregon), there have been years where literally the smoke is like weeks-long fogs. Imagine having asthma, living where the smoke just lingers- it’s inside, it’s outside, there’s no getting away from it.

It’s more than just fighting fires, there are reasons why they’re so bad (improper forest management, fire suppression), but firefighters are just a liiiiiitttle important.

Yeah I remember during the biscuit fire there being air quality warnings for most of the fucking year, that straight up shortened the lives of people who were forced to work outside due to their jobs, etc. And THAT FOREST FIRE TOO was worsened by federal government fuckery. (8

we straight up need our volunteers out there, there’s no possible way we could staff enough firefighters to fight some of these fires, volunteers are an absolute necessity to our survival out there. and to not pay them? fucking disgusting.

California to feds: Pay $18M fire debt or we’ll watch it burn

tiger-in-the-flightdeck:

I was going to make key lime pie, and the shop on the corner had limes on sale for ten cents each. So I bought two dozen of them. When I got home, several things occurred to me.

  1. I don’t know how to make key lime pie.
  2. I don’t have any other ingredients to make key lime pie.
  3. I now have two dozen limes staring from the top of me fridge. Judging me. Judging me for not turning them into anything.
  4. Limes are kinda delicious in water.

wilwheaton:

micdotcom:

8 months later, the nation’s top cyberbullying experts still haven’t heard from Melania Trump

  • Eight months ago Melania Trump announced she would take on cyberbullying as first lady of the United States.
  • Today, some of the nation’s most prominent anti-cyberbullying experts told Mic that neither they nor any of their colleagues in the field had been contacted by Trump or anyone from her staff.
  • “It’s one of the many mysteries of the 2016 presidential campaign,” Larry Magid, CEO of ConnectSafely, “Why she chose to put herself in a position where she is taking on the very issue that her husband is so publicly guilty of is just bizarre.”
  • After her stated commitment, Magid told Mic he reached out directly to Trump to work with her on how she could be an effective combatant of cyberbullying. However, he said he heard no response from either the first lady or anyone from her office. Read more (7/7/17)

Nobody could have predicted this.

kattylove6092:

tiger-in-the-flightdeck:

I’ve been dealing with a pretty frightening medical issue recently, so I’m not surprised it slipped my mind that my birthday is coming up in a few weeks. If you’ve been following me for more than a year, you might recall that my birthday is not a good time for me, and with this health problem, that’s more true than ever. So, this year? I’m going to be utterly shameless!

My birthday is on July 31st. Until then, send me happy messages! Tell me abut cute cats you saw! Leave groan worthy puns in my inbox! Tag me in funny posts!

Or, if you’re feeling generous, drop a few bucks in my tip jar paypal.me/tigerintheflightdeck or http://ko-fi.com/A4027SH  so I can get myself a present.

Guys please support and love on my tumblr big sister.