The Hypnosis community (if one could call it a community as a whole as opposed to breaking it into site or location based groups) has a slight image issue. Many sites take a very dim view of it (mostly due to payment processors having issues). The biggest issue that comes up is consent and people using hypnosis to push consent.
When I introduce or teach people about hypnosis I am surprised by how many people don’t really know about how to ask for consent well. So I felt like giving my checklist of how to ask for consent and negotiate a scene.
Now while these are in the form of questions they are more sub-headings. Each of these sections can be one to ten questions depending on the answers given by both parties.
1) Can I hypnotize you? This is the most basic question and of course if you get an answer of no you should move onto a different topic of conversation.
2) Do you want this to have any erotic themes or undertones? Again, this is important. Trance is not linked to eroticism and this is something people can forget when they have a fetish. This is used to inform your plan of what to do during the session
3) Is it okay if I do X with you? This question is one you should repeat with everything you plan to do. Honestly everything. Having everything laid out in advance allows you to make sure everything is mutually agreed to.
4) Can I touch you during this? Again you should split this question into parts, finding out where you can touch. I tend to always ask for consent to touch the arms and shoulders in case the person flops or rolls into an awkward position, it means if needs be I can easily help and guide them into a better physical position.
5) Do you have any specific names or pronouns you would prefer me to use during this? Now in general conversation you should have already got their usual pronouns as a matter of common decency but some people may wish for alternatives to be used during the activity itself.
6) Do you have any words/ideas/images/names I should avoid? This again is very useful. I, for instance hate having the back of my neck touched and wouldn’t be too pleased if someone did it.
7) Do you have anything you want to ask or discuss? Very often I see people negotiating one way and the person being tranced gets steamrollered into answering what the hypnotist wants. If the person has been quiet this question gives them the chance to raise any issues or ask any questions they might have on their mind.
I do realize that I write this from the perspective of the hypnotist, mostly because I seem to teach them more frequently. But when I am a subject I still will ask these questions to the hypnotist.
Remember, consent is the very basis of what we do and hopefully by all of us embracing and making sure we get full consent with agency for everything we do we can try and undo many of the negative images other people have of our community.
Again, not Sherlock. This is a drawing for the advent calendar I make for my mother and her husband every year. it will be a puzzle, one piece goes to each little box or bag. Along with a little surprise, normally sweets or a Christmas ornament.
Tagging the folks who have wanted to see the Christmas cards. Just in case you like kittens. ♥
329 Cannon House Office Building Washington, DC 20515 Phone: 202-225-2931 FAX: 202-225-2944
Woodstock District Office
9898 Highway 92, Suite 100 Woodstock, GA 30188 Phone: 770-429-1776 FAX: 770 -517-7427
Cartersville District Office
135 West Cherokee Avenue, Suite 122 Cartersville, GA 30120 Phone: 770-429-1776
Galleria District Office
600 Galleria Pkwy, Suite 120 Atlanta, GA 30339 Phone: 770-429-1776 Fax: 678-556-5184
it would be best if constituents from these districts called! ask some questions and let them know we are not ok with this!
Please please please call these reps and the reps in your own state. We NEED to maintain protection for these species, as it is the only way to preserve the ecosystems that we DIRECTLY DEPEND ON for carbon sequestering, clean water, and clean air!!
Ever since Jodie mentioned that her doctor costume was entirely inspired by one black and white image I’ve been desperate to try and find it. I had a REAAAL search of Pinterest today and I’m pretty sure I’ve found it!
She described the photo as a short haired woman wearing cropped trousers, a t shirt with braces and boots. This is the only image I’ve found that has that combo. Jodie also mentioned the image was black and white, timeless, and the woman in question was striding deep in thought. The woman above clearly fits all of this, and it had 3k pins on Pinterest so she could quite easily find it.
So yah, I’m 90% sure this is the image that inspired the thirteenth doctor’s look
“I kind of presented a mood board. I had an acorn and he turned it into the most beautiful tree. I could kind of say what I meant, and then he would present a look, and it elevated everything I’d suggested, and erased the bits that he knew without telling me didn’t work. But, essentially, I found a photo, and it’s just a Google image, and I have no idea what decade it is, but it’s a woman in crop trousers that are slightly big, with a T-shirt, and [suspenders], and with boots, walking and thinking. I just love the androgyny of it, without it being masculine, and I think that’s a really important line to find and quite a difficult one as well.”
Did some quick reverse image searching and I’ve identitied the photo was from the alternative/indie girl magazine Sassy, September 1988 – “Big Bottoms”!
Not sure if me singlehandedly finding this image is an attribute to my research skills, or the fact I had way too much time on my hands one day over the summer
Since telling my Mum that I considered myself ace, I already noticed that she was a bit… too interested, if you want to say it like that. Asking for “signs”, or how being ace feels like… I tried to answer her to the best of my ability, giving her links to websites that would explain better as I ever could.
Today she said, very quietly, “Do you think I could be ace, too?”
And I said very carefully “If you think it suits you, I don’t see why not”
And my Mum, my strong, self-confident Mum, who never once has ever felt uncomfortable in her own skin as far as I know, beamed in relief. Relief.
Because she never knew. Because getting married young and bearing children for her husband (meaning sex) was expected of her. Because everyone gave her the feeling as if something would be wrong or broken about her if she didn’t want, didn’t do that.
Because her whole life long, she thought there was something wrong with her.
I’m honestly torn between feeling happy and relieved for her, and angry that humanity has such trouble with showing some understanding to those who don’t fit in the boxes society has designed for all of us.
Update: My
Mum was getting ready for bed when I noticed her humming loudly around her
toothbrush and I asked her what the good mood was about.
She beamed
around a mouth-full of toothpaste and said, very proudly and deliberately, “I
think I like that, being ace.”
And continued
on with her brushing, humming a bit louder.
(Or in
other words, I’m more than a little bit teary eyed.)
I had almost the exact same conversation with my Mom. We were talking about the LGBT acronym and explained that it’s LGBTQ and that some people add the PIA at the end as well. And she asked me “What’s the a?” So when I explained it she said immediately “Me. That’s like me.”
This is why I get so mad at people who think this is all just trendy bs, people just don’t have the vocabulary or permission to describe their lived experience.
This is the most wholesome thing I’ve ever read, bless this post 🙌🏼
My grandmother was absolutely ace, but never had words to describe that.
I made these in response to hate crimes in my community. They are full size and free to download and print if you’d like to use them, too.
Since these are going around, I wanted to fill in some of the gaps! Here are seven more posters for communities under threat. As with the first set, these are completely free to download, print, share, repost, etc with no credit needed. This is open source activism.
Beltainefaerie's Flights of Fancy 