aside from this comic being really cute and honest, it also points out this really huge glaring problem in the gay community in relation to trans-men.
in my experience with a lot of gay men, they have this extremely purist view when it comes to what being a “real man” is, which is bad enough when you have different gay subcultures (bears, gymrats, etc) who have different specific definitions of what a “real man” is.
however for the most part, many gay men seem to agree upon a point of leaving trans-men not only out of their gender, but out of their sexuality as well and I have a real fucking problem with that.
i’m pretty open about things that relate to my sexuality, and i myself identify more or less as a homosexual, but i’ve found the worst part in the gay community is dealing with this bullshit. eventually i found that i at least have the luxury of telling guys to fuck off if i don’t meet their standards, but i know that’s a lot harder for folk when they seem to have the entire population of homosexuals more or less invalidating not only their gender, but their orientation as well.
with all of that said, i just ask this. if you happen to be a cisgender homosexual, like myself, don’t tell other gay men that they aren’t actually gay if they’re dating or have had relations with a trans-man because that’s a load of fucking bullshit.
more important, under any circumstance do not tell a trans-man they’re not a man or that they aren’t allowed to like other men who are homosexual, be they cis or trans.
that’s all i really wanted to say.
This entire response is gold.
Also, this same thing applies to trans women and their lesbian partners as well.
A cis lesbian with a trans partner is still lesbian, same as a cis gay with one is.
Neither of them are straight regardless of what they do with their partner’s junk.
THIS COMIC IS BEAUTIFUL AND BRILLIANT AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH
Sara Jacobsen, 19, grew up eating family dinners beneath a stunning Native American robe.
Not
that she gave it much thought. Until, that is, her senior year of high
school, when she saw a picture of a strikingly similar robe in an art
history class.
The teacher told the class about how the robe was
used in spiritual ceremonies, Sara Jacobsen said. “I started to wonder
why we have it in our house when we’re not Native American.”
She said she asked her dad a few questions about this robe. Her dad, Bruce Jacobsen, called that an understatement.
“I
felt like I was on the wrong side of a protest rally, with terms like
‘cultural appropriation’ and ‘sacred ceremonial robes’ and ‘completely
inappropriate,’ and terms like that,” he said.
“I got defensive
at first, of course,” he said. “I was like, ‘C’mon, Sara! This is more
of the political stuff you all say these days.’”
But Sara didn’t
back down. “I feel like in our country there are so many things that
white people have taken that are not theirs, and I didn’t want to
continue that pattern in our family,” she said.
The robe had been
a centerpiece in the Jacobsen home. Bruce Jacobsen bought it from a
gallery in Pioneer Square in 1986, when he first moved to Seattle. He
had wanted to find a piece of Native art to express his appreciation of
the region.
The Chilkat robe that hung over the Jacobsen dining room table for years. Credit Courtesy of the Jacobsens
“I just thought it was so beautiful, and it was like nothing I had seen before,” Jacobsen said.
The
robe was a Chilkat robe, or blanket, as it’s also known. They are woven
by the Tlingit, Haida and Tsimshian peoples of Alaska and British
Columbia and are traditionally made from mountain goat wool. The tribal
or clan origin of this particular 6-foot-long piece was unclear, but it
dated back to around 1900 and was beautifully preserved down to its long
fringe.
“It’s a completely symmetric pattern of geometric
shapes, and also shapes that come from the culture,” like birds,
Jacobsen said. “And then it’s just perfectly made — you can see no seams
in it at all.”
Jacobsen hung the robe on his dining room wall.
After
more needling from Sara, Jacobsen decided to investigate her claims. He
emailed experts at the Burke Museum, which has a huge collection of
Native American art and artifacts.
“I got this eloquent email
back that said, ‘We’re not gonna tell you what to go do,’ but then they
confirmed what Sara said: It was an important ceremonial piece, that it
was usually owned by an entire clan, that it would be passed down
generation to generation, and that it had a ton of cultural significance
to them.“
Jacobsen
says he was a bit disappointed to learn that his daughter was right
about his beloved Chilkat robe. But he and his wife Gretchen now no
longer thought of the robe as theirs. Bruce Jacobsen asked the curators
at the Burke Museum for suggestions of institutions that would do the
Chilkat robe justice. They told him about the Sealaska Heritage
Institute in Juneau.
When Jacobsen emailed, SHI Executive
Director Rosita Worl couldn’t believe the offer. “I was stunned. I was
shocked. I was in awe. And I was so grateful to the Jacobsen family.”
Worl said the robe has a huge monetary value. But that’s not why it’s precious to local tribes.
“It’s
what we call ‘atoow’: a sacred clan object,” she said. “Our beliefs are
that it is imbued with the spirit of not only the craft itself, but
also of our ancestors. We use [Chilkat robes] in our ceremonies when we
are paying respect to our elders. And also it unites us as a people.”
Since
the Jacobsens returned the robe to the institute, Worl said, master
weavers have been examining it and marveling at the handiwork. Chilkat
robes can take a year to make – and hardly anyone still weaves them.
“Our
master artist, Delores Churchill, said it was absolutely a spectacular
robe. The circles were absolutely perfect. So it does have that
importance to us that it could also be used by our younger weavers to
study the art form itself.”
Worl said private collectors hardly ever return anything to her organization. The federal Native American Graves Protection and Repatriation Act requires
museums and other institutions that receive federal funding to
repatriate significant cultural relics to Native tribes. But no such law
exists for private collectors.
Bruce
and Gretchen Jacobsen hold the Chilkat robe they donated to the
Sealaska Heritage Institute as Joe Zuboff, Deisheetaan, sings and drums
and Brian Katzeek (behind robe) dances during the robe’s homecoming
ceremony Saturday, August 26, 2017. Credit NOBU KOCH / SEALASKA HERITAGE INSTITUTE
Worl
says the institute is lobbying Congress to improve the chances of
getting more artifacts repatriated. “We are working on a better tax
credit system that would benefit collectors so that they could be
compensated,” she said.
Worl hopes stories like this will encourage people to look differently at the Native art and artifacts they possess.
The Sealaska Heritage Institute welcomed home the Chilkat robe in a two-hour ceremony over the weekend. Bruce and Gretchen Jacobsen traveled to Juneau to celebrate the robe’s homecoming.
Really glad that this is treated as hard hitting news, no really, I am
I can’t decide whether these Guinness flavored potato chips rae awesome or an abomination, but I like them better paired with goldfish crackers and a little Baybel cheese than by themselves
that isn’t a very high recommendation of it needs two other things to make it bearable.
yeah, but you know me and my snack mixes, so…? I finished my little snack bowl of them. I still can’t decide. Definitely wasn’t instant love like the biscuits and gravy chips.
Looking up air travel with BDSM equipment.
I can’t decide whether these Guinness flavored potato chips rae awesome or an abomination, but I like them better paired with goldfish crackers and a little Baybel cheese than by themselves
At first glance, this new bill proposed by Texas Sen. Konni Burton seems harmless. Do a little digging, however, and its intention is crystal clear: The bill would require teachers to out LGBTQ students to their parents. The public knows this because Burton said as much herself.
this is so vile
God this is disgusting
NO
WHATEVER YALL FUCKING DO DONT LET THIS BILL PASS
As a closeted queer kids, the only irl place I can be myself is at school. The people there know. I’m not quiet about it. And they’re okay with it. And that takes some of the pain of being closeted from my family okay because hey I have a community that accepts me.
I wouldn’t be affected by this bill but for all the kids that are like me, that consider school a save haven, this could fuck some major shit up.
Don’t let this bill pass. Please.
Texas what the fUCK… Please don’t let this be real
DON’T LET THIS PASS!!!
Okay, this post is for everyone who is on the fence about this stupid post or needs to face the reality of it, okay? Lets get real. Story time.
So when I was freshman in high school, I knew this sweet girl. We’ll call her Hailey. She was a high b-average student, and she wanted to be a veterinarian. She had a rough life but was like a younger sister to her friends, and got along well with about everyone because of her bubbly nature. And as you probably suspect, she was gay. She found herself around sixth grade, so she established to her friends. But her friends only.
But during her freshman year, something horrible happened. One of her friend’s parents told her parents she was gay. Now what you need to know about this woman is that she didn’t do this out of any sense of cruelty. Her own son was gay, and she’d really struggled with that for awhile before accepting him and openly supporting him. And their relationship was great now.
So she wanted to tell Hailey’s parents, as a conservative parent as a gay child herself, because she felt like her reaction had been extreme, and she’d acted cruely and had wronged her child. She wanted to be there for them if they had negative reactions, and talk them through her experience.
Now Hailey, she had begged this woman not to. She had even cried over it, because she knew her parents, but this woman really thought she knew what was best and everything would be better once she no longer had to hide. And went off and told them behind Hailey’s back, without listening to her or giving her *any warning.*
And this woman said Hailey’s parents were quiet when she gave them the news. They listened to her entire story and experiences. They even asked a question or two, and said they’d talk about this with Hailey. And the woman left feeling like she’d done the right thing.
But she the furthest thing from the right thing that you can imagine. Hailey’s parents didn’t pick her up at the bus stop, so she walked home all by herself. She didn’t know she’d been outed, or anything was off. She thought her parents might just be working late.
And as she’s told me of the account afterwards: “I was happy. I’d passed that math test and I was going to ask my Dad if he might help me practice driving when I get home because I was thinking about taking Driver’s Ed. I thought it weird they weren’t returning my texts to tell me they were going to be late because we don’t live in the safest neighborhood, and they don’t like me walking alone, but I wasn’t worried. And then I got home… And then I got home and my parents were waiting for me, and I just. Knew. I just KNEW. Something about their expressions and way they stood up gave it away.”
And what happened next I was forced to believe. She told me, she just ran to the front door, but her Dad grabbed her and held her down. And as he held her down, her Mom proceeded to beat the living shit out of her.
And I’m not talking a slap across the face, or being struck with a belt. It was so bad that her screams – she was lucky enough to have run and got to the front door to be heard by a passing neighbor walking his kids home – who called the police.
But until they arrived, for minutes on minutes she was beaten by Dad and Mom. When she came back to school, she had bruises on her wrists from where she’d thrashed trying to get away from her Dad’s iron grip, and a fractured wrist. She had an ugly bruised and STITCHED forehead from where her mom’s wedding ring had gotten her, and black and bruised skin across her stomach from where she’d been repeatedly stomped on.
And you must be thinking, oh my God what horrible parents. They must have been punished harshly.
No. They spent just a single night in jail, and I still don’t know if they were later charged. Hailey was forced to leave her home. She told me no one would take her in, and never told me where she ended up having to stay.
And did I mention she was made to come to school the next day? Because she did. She tried to hide the injuries, but you really can’t hide those. Especially when you aren’t even wearing your own clothes because you weren’t allowed to go home and get them.
And I could tell you more. I could tell you how her parents wouldn’t let her back in her house to get ANY of her things. I could tell you how aunts and uncles turned her away like she was ridden with an STD.
I could tell you about how she dropped out of high school, or apparently the girl who wanted to be a veterinarian one day because she wanted to take care of sick animals and make them better tried to take her own life months later.
I could tell you that after that day, I didn’t see her again until I ran into her a YEAR later by chance. This girl VANISHED for a year. Her friends clammed up about her, like they were afraid and determined to not tell anyone where she was at any time. Ever.
So the next time you say OUTING someone couldn’t be that bad, or that making it law for a child’s safe place to out them is right or doesn’t concern you – remember Hailey. Remember the little sister-like girl who wanted to be a vet and once only seriously worried about math tests and learning to drive.
And you what? Hailey told me she still sees herself as someone lucky. Because she lives with her Grandpa now who flew down from Florida to take care of her. And she feels lucky because she still has someone, and because she’s still ALIVE.
So you remember that when they try to pass this law. You remember Hailey, and all those like her who were treated worse and aren’t here anymore. You probably know of someone. Remember people like Hailey, and protect them. Because when they say it IT ISN’T SAFE FOR THEM TO BE OUTED, believe them!!!
Because all it took was ONE person feeling obligated to out her, who didn’t believe Hailey, and before she was ready to leave home safely to cause all this.
This bill has made it to the senate but it’s still in committee, it’s close but not quite passed yet. There’s still time
My mother also talked about periods to my brothers.
When I first got mine I had terrible cramps. Crippling cramps. I once was camping with my family and a few of my big brother’s friends when my period came. My cramps were so bad that my mom gave me a full pain killer ( I was 13 and before that she only gave me pills cut in half).
I literally laid down on my parents’ air mattress and cried in pain for an hour before the pill kicked in.
My brothers friend came in to the big tent and I was just curled up and sobbing. Now, I was quite the tomboy and was known to rough house with my brothers and their friends and made sure I wasnt seen as just “a little girl.” So my brother’s friend was confused to see me openly weeping in the fetal position (seriously, these were the worst cramps I have had in my life. My vision went white). He asked what was wrong with me.
My big brother stood up immediately and suggested a nice long hike. During this hike I am sure he had a pretty awkward conversation with his friend explaining menstrual cramps, because when they got back the pain pill had (mostly) kicked in and I was sitting up at a table when my brother’s friend sheepishly asked me if I was feeling better. I said I was better, and he said good.
When we made s’mores that night my brother and his friend kept me well supplied with chocolate.
Making sure sons know as much about periods and menstruation as daughters makes them better brothers, better sons better fathers, and better men. A man that understands a period will not lightly accuse a woman of “being on her period” if the woman is in an argument.
Raise better sons Teach them about normal bodily functions.
Beltainefaerie's Flights of Fancy 